i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
