opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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