The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Contrary to what peaches says, you can't fuck the pain away. Full story later. Have a good morning, buddy.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Just went outside to gather hail to use to make margaritas since we ran out of ice. That's God's way of helping us out.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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