No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
If it's any consolation, I've been sitting in the hallway in assless chaps for the past thirty minutes
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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