And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
