So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I made a booty call at 3:30 am on a Monday... I think I just became the ultimate female fuckboy. I don't know whether to be ashamed or get myself a trophy.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
