hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Would you say that skipping class and sitting alone in my room singing One Direction to myself and sobbing is an acceptable way to deal with the break-up
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
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