you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
