But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
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