Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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