My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
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