We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Randomize
