You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
