never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Fuck. I'm going to pass the savings right on to the strippers. It's trickle down economics.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Randomize
