if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
Randomize
