Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
there COULD be a gas leak in our house... proceeding to smoke with extreme caution...
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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