It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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