i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I literally stopped banging her when my ESPN app alerted me that the Spurs had won. That's how much I hate Lebron. I would rather watch him cry in the post game interviews than get it in
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Randomize
