It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
A 74 year old man offered to let me sleep on his pull out couch last night.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
Randomize
