Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
ALSO, bringing a stapler to the bar is a good idea
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Randomize