I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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