i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Reggie can tackle my bush.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
The best walk of shames are on the highway
Randomize
