Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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