ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
This is not a drill. I need a cape. And a tuxedo. Simultaneously. Repeat. NOT. A. DRILL....
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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