Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
If we ever start off with margaritas for breakfast and end up naked covered in olive oil...I could think of worse ways to spend a day.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
