Sponge bath it is.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize
