just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
The trees feel like magic. Come fly to taco bell with me.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
I am about five seconds from ripping off my clothes and throwing myself into the ocean to become a mermaid
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize
