Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
The maid of honor just puked.
he thought i was a dude.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
We just won 1800 at the casino and are going to the strip club. Who gives a fuck if it's 5pm
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
