I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me.
you're writing country songs now?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I need moral support for this bender
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
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