He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
He considered it romantic when he told me mid-blow job that no matter what happens, he will "never forget how good of a dick I suck". Verbatim.
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
He did a backflip because drugs
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
