i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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