There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
I need to wash the frat house off of me
She's the good dick fairy. You buy her a beer and half an hour later the best lay in the place is asking to take you home.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
Randomize
