maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Randomize
