Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Woke up naked on my floor covered in cookies. We should celebrate fake hurricanes every weekend.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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