i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
God forbid we drive unregistered mopeds without license plates on a pedestrians only sidewalk without goggles while flipping off passing cars.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Long story short if you're going to get drunk on a sailboat at night leave your phone in the car.
A bitchslap is in order.
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
