So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
the only way to explain how i feel is someone rolled me down a big fucking hill and then a dog came a took a huge ruthless shit in my mouth at the bottom
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
AND I JUST BURNT MY BACON. WTF MONDAY. SCREW YOU TOO
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
He can't say no, it's my spiritual goddamn quest.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
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