brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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