is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
