Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
Just got back from the tanning beds. I'm a lobster. I fear for the safety of my nipples falling off.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Randomize
