Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
