i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
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