what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
I woke up to somebody tossing my salad... I should have drank more
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
i just remembered i chipped my tooth last night when i pulled up your pants zipper with my teeth
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
It was the night of "what the fuck have you done with my daughter and where is she" texts from mom...
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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