He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize
