We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
We are two peas in an std pod
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
You three are like the Bermuda Triangle for morals.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
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