i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
thank you for being a reason not to completely check out of my life and start sleeping all day, crying all night, and living off vodka acquired through credit card debt
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
