she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i checked my sent messages this morning and i had apparently tried to text the bar, saying "idk what i drank, do you?"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
