Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
