I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
