The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
I guess the weekly d&d orgies are treating you well
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize
