I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
Randomize
